Please litigate my syntax and formatting choices across fifteen separate comments on Github… for this five line-of-code change. Better yet, why don't you reject my pull request until I guess exactly what you're thinking the code should look like. Supportive, coöperative co-working can be an enormously beneficial process for improving our ability to deliver high quality work, but let's make our code review process as antagonistic and accusatory as possible!

In this presentation, we'll gnash our teeth for a bit about how useless and pointless most code review processes tend to be… and when we eventually calm down, we'll try to talk about how to improve these processes, and provide a framing for how to conduct these as a useful quality control tool.